Saturday, March 26, 2011

oh boy!


It's been a massive week here trying to project manage tradesmen, the little guy suddenly crying at kinder drop off again, the six year olds 'ways' and the big boy, well we are all learning a lot about life and parenting there! So this weekend I am very grateful for time to reflect, to step back, take it all in and to spending time with friends & their families around homemade wood-fired pizza & wine all afternoon..

It's true, when our mama's and nana's tell us how life is easy with babies, just wait till they grow up..boy were they right, and this is only the beginning!  It's so difficult trying to guide your babies through life, wanting to protect them, to shield them from all the bad stuff.  The reality is we can't.  We have to let them grow, let them make their own decisions and to be responsible for the choices they make.  Of course we do our best everyday, nurturing them teaching them right from wrong how to become good, loving, honest, respectful and compassionate people.  It's not easy.

Our big boy learned a huge lesson this week.  It was just horrible to watch him go through it, but I'm so proud that he acknowledged his mistake, owned it and was mature enough to face his friend and their parents and apologise for the role he played.  The role he played was not the villain by any means, but it wasn't right, he knew that, and he certainly knows it now!  At first I was furious at him, the other kids, the whole situation.  Then I just wanted to cry for him, but I held it back I asked him the questions, allowed him to answer to share his side and to realise what he'd done. 

When he approached the parents and other child, he didn't get into the whole 'he said, she said' banter, he could have, he wasn't the only one in the wrong, but he let it go and wore it.  A big deal when you're a 9 year old kid.  He's hurt, and sorry and he feels a bit let down by others, but he has learned something immeasurable, something that I believe will have a profound effect on who he is becoming, the kind of person he wants to be.

Oh boy, the years ahead seem a little torturous...argh, give me strength!!

Visit Maxabella for more grateful posts...

*I couldn't find a pic that felt right for this post, and as I was doing the dishes, admiring my babusha cups I was thinking how nice it would be to keep our babies all tucked in safe & sound like that...so that's the relevance, incase you wondered...

12 comments:

  1. Oh your post made me cry this morning. We've also had a very emotional week in the friends and school department. Your boy sounds so mature and wonderful. Everyone makes mistakes, it is awesome that he owned his. I hope your weekend is sunny and drama free. X

    ReplyDelete
  2. What a heart wrench (I am dreading this hard-core emotional parenting that is ahead of me). But a good outcome in the end so you should be proud of your boy and yourself.

    I love that you chose the Babushkas for this post. Just perfect.

    Thanks for linking up with Maxabella's grateful linky x

    ReplyDelete
  3. I agree with the Mums and Nans. Babies for ME was much easier. It gets very tricky as they get older, dealing with other children and adults. Your boys are and will continue to be lovely boys as they have parents who love them to bits and guide them through life's difficulties.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Boy it sounds like we have had kind of the same week...I had to go to the principal and our 5th grader is so hormonal crying and crabby, I'm exhausted. Today I brought Mimi and her friend home and her friend kicked water all over me and told me to shut up!!! I'm off for the wine bottle....hehe
    Have a super weekend rest and relax....

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love the relevance of the pic!!
    It is such a hard lesson to try to teach them to just take responsibility for their actions - especially when it seems so few of their peers are taught the same lesson and all seem only too happy to live in a blame culture.
    I hope your boy feels proud of the way he handled himself - because I certainly can tell his mum is proud of him :-)
    have a great weekend
    xxxCate

    ReplyDelete
  6. you are such a wonderful Mamma. I don't really have much more to say.

    ReplyDelete
  7. This is a beautiful post..we share the same sentiments on raising children. I think it's really important that children learn to take ownership of their mistakes, it helps build character and inner strength not to mention lessons learned.
    Your son sounds like a fine young man :)
    xx

    ReplyDelete
  8. The babushka insight is brilliant..that's exactly what we want for our kids..and yet when I remember my childhood I wanted just the opposite!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Your words are perfectly chosen, I love this post! And it is so so true, I am afraid. I wish I could protect my little ones too and avoid tough situations. We have to trust in our little ones, off course we do so. Off we are for a torturous time...
    xxxxx

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am sure you know this poem, but it's always soothing to read these beautiful words.


    On Children
    Kahlil Gibran

    Your children are not your children.
    They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
    They come through you but not from you,
    And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

    You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
    For they have their own thoughts.
    You may house their bodies but not their souls,
    For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
    which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
    You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
    For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

    You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
    The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and he bends you with his might that his arrows may go swift and far.
    Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
    For even as he loves the arrow that flies,
    so he loves also the bow that is stable.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Poor sausage. Glad you found a way through it :-).

    ReplyDelete
  12. I love the picture you chose - and it sounds like you all dealt with a tricky situation really well - thanks for sharing, it helps us all to learn from each other - and to know we're not alone!!
    I love that quote from Sim's comment from Kahlil Gibran's On Children too!

    ReplyDelete

Thankyou for visiting & taking the time to comment, I enjoy reading each & every one...
Unfortunately due to the amount of spam messages I have had to reinstate the word verification, sorry for the inconvenience..